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January 1, 2002

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Happy New Year! - All of us at MacMonkies wish you all a splendid New Year! Please be safe in your celebrating activities!

Crazy Coconuts Holiday Giveaway - Our Holiday DVD giveaway is officially over. We will announce the winners on Wednesday. Good Luck!

Good Luck!

December 31, 2001

Norton Anti Virus - January virus definitions for Norton Anti Virus are now available for download. Virex definitions are also available.

 

Be A Winner! - Today's the last day to sign up for your chance to win:

A Brand new Philips DVD/CD Player with remote control, Bundled with Jim Carrey's
"How the Grinch Stole Christmas"
on DVD

and

"The Family Man" on DVD

 

All you have to do is enter to win!

CLICK HERE!

Looky!

Weekend Update

December 30, 2001

It's (Almost) Official! - We have officially moved www.macmonkies.com to our new server! We have just a few files to modify, transfer, and unpack at the new place. Keep the above URL handy as we will be "reopening" soon!

Typing Like Mad!

December 28, 2001

New GUI! - Flax Creations updates with 5 beautiful new desktop pictures. Check 'em out!

Flax Creations

Attention Beta Testers - If you are a Beta Tester for AOL, the AOL Beta Team would like to remind everyone to "go to Keyword: Beta or Upgrade to download the GM version of AOL for Mac OS X. All beta versions of the AOL software for Mac OS X will be blocked the week of January 2, 2002. This includes all builds from build 19B and below."

Looky!

Network News

December 26, 2001

Up Front - from the Editor

This year, as Summer closed and Fall fell, it seemed that doom and gloom filled the air in a way like never before. This particular Monkie was far from thrilled by the events in September that changed our lives forever. It was certainly less than easy peeling a Banana Smile in light of the events. But strangely enough, people pulled together and the smiles seemed more abundant than ever.

It took awhile, but a positive outlook seemed prominently more permanent. It takes a great deal from within to overcome, but one group of people deserves a great deal of thanks for the encouragement to roll with the Coconuts:

YOU!

Thanks for making MacMonkies such an enjoyable effort thus far!

Smile!

 

Congrats! - Congratulations to Paul Maeder. Paul has won a copy of "Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace" on DVD in our "Oops Award" simply for dropping us a line!

MonkieNews!Ape!

 

 

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CLICK HERE

for Details

 

  • New Home for MacMonkies! - Please keep in mind that MacMonkies will soon be making our move to a new home. So, if you are currently using the www.macmonkies.com URL to surf to MacMonkies, please keep the following URL handy in case you have any troubles getting aboard:

http://homepage.mac.com/macmonkies

Both URL's are currently active, but there may be a slight lag during the transfer to the new server. We will also continue to mirror the site on the mac.com host for a period of time after the transfer is complete. Thanks for your patience while we make the move!

  • New in the Gallery! -

Act Naturally! - Three new desktops straight from Monkie Country enter our Nature Department:

The Long and Winding Road,

Shine On Through,

&

Blessed

In Another Land - Two new "out-of-this-world" 3-D works land in the 3-D Area .

Day After

&

Different Worlds

Enjoy!

  • Updates - For easier navigation, we have separated our Updates section into 2 categories: Mac OS9 and Mac OSX!

  • On its Way! - In the mood for a melody? A new addition to MacMonkies is on its way! Be sure to take note!

 

 

Happy Holidays! - We wish you the best during this Holiday Season!

Happy Holidays!

Are We There Yet??? - Berlin reported a 90-mile long traffic jam trapping 60,000 Germans in their cars during their first endeavors to go holiday shopping. The traffic jam was due to snow and ice which had accumulated and blown into drifts up to four feet high. A police spokesman said the traffic jam was "certainly the worst we have ever seen." Travelers were trapped inside their vehicles for 14 hours. Talk about drivin' ya crazy! - from Excite

Blue Storm in the Forecast Storm- Watch out for the Blue Storm! The Blue Storm is a new supercomputer that will predict the weather twice as fast as weather computers that are currently being used. The computer, put out by IBM, will handle in a single second the number of calculations it would take a person using a calculator 17 million years to figure. Some say that by the time the Blue Storm is released in 2004 it will not be any faster than other weather computers at that time. But however the speeds compare, the Blue Storm is sure to be impressive. With a name like Blue Storm, it sounds like a bad forecast ahead! - From MSNBC

Top of the Apple To Ya! - Apple was listed as one of the top five online retailers for the month of November this year. According to Neilson's list of the top five online retailers, Apple came in 5th with 6.1 million "unique visitors." Also topping the list were: Amazon.com/31.5 million; Columbia House/8.7 million; Toysrus.com/7.6 million; Barnes and Noble/6.2 million. To view the top 15 online retailers listed, CLICK HERE or visit the "Very Ape" section of MacMonkies!

Big Bad Broadband - AT&T Broadband has merged with Comquest in a $72 billion deal. Together, AT&T Comquest will have 21 million subscribers. AT&T Broadband is already the largest cable company in the United States, but this merge will give them an even sharper edge among local telephone companies in offering high internet speed services. Can you say "Monopoly Revisited?" - from MSNBC

Self-Serve ISP - BT's DIY Broadband will be available in a self-install package January 15th. This will eliminate the need to have a home visit from the local "techies" to install cable services. It should also cut prices as the connection fee would be $50 instead of $150 and the monthly fee would be $25 instead of $30. The service will only be provided to some broadband suppliers, including BTopenworld. - from Macuser

Who's Garbage Is It Anyway? - A 55-year-old sanitation worker in Tokyo has become well known for taking his job a bit too seriously. Japan has strict rules on the seperation and disposal of their garbage, and Mizuo Tamura is so insistent upon enforcing those rules that he is referred to as the "God of Garbage." He pulled a knife on a local bar owner recently and was arrested, telling the authorities that "(The bar owner) wasn't separating his rubbish properly." Apparently Tamura has been arrested many times before while trying to enforce the garbage rules. Sounds like a bunch of rubbish to me! - from Excite

 

the Apevine

Have you Heard?

Macworld Expo - The Macworld Expo will be held in San Francisco from January 7-11, 2002. Will the G4 see one more update? Will we see the new G5 chips? How about the "new" iMac2? Will the Expo introduce a new flat panel iMac? Rumors are running amuck the closer we get to the festivities...Stay tuned!

 

Have some inside information on upcoming events? Review our Submission Policy and drop us a line!

 

Very Ape!

Check 'em Out!

Shop Till You Drop! - Looking for confidence in E-Shopping? How about NetRatings top 15 E-tailers for November 2001? Take a Look!

amazon.com

Columbia House

ToysRus

Barnes and Noble

apple.com

bestbuy.com

dell.com

walmart.com

hp.com

sears.com

target.com

JCPenney

cdnow.com

hallmark.com

compaq.com

Check 'em Out!

Bananas!

Just Plain Nutz!

ELEMENTARY, MY DEAR WATSON!

In case you haven't heard it yet, here is the world's funniest joke put out by the British Association for the Advancement of Science and voted on by popular demand over the Internet: (Drumroll please...)

Famed fictional detective Sherlock Holmes and his gruff assistant Doctor Watson pitch their tent while on a camping expedition, but in the middle of the night Holmes nudges Watson awake and questions him.

HOLMES: Watson, look up at the stars and tell me what you deduce.

WATSON: I see millions of stars, and if there are millions of stars, and if even a few of those have planets, it is quite likely there are some planets like earth, and if there are a few planets like earth out there there might also be life.

HOLMES: Watson, you idiot! Somebody stole our tent."

- from Excite

 

GOIN' PRO!

Q: Why did the coach go to the Bank?

A: To get his Quarterback!

Contributed by Lana Spicer

 

WAYS TO TELL A REDNECK IS ON YOUR COMPUTER

  • The mouse is referred to as a "critter."
  • The keyboard is camouflaged.
  • There is a Skoal can in the CD-ROM drive.
  • The password is, "bubba."
  • The numeric keypad only goes up to six.
  • Winders 95 has a Dale Earnhardt sticker on it.
  • Outgoing faxes have beerstains on them.
  • The printer goes really slow since Bubba don't read too fast.
  • The extra RAM slots have Dodge truck parts installed in them.
  • The menus all have Budweiser, Black Label, and Old Milwaukee options.
  • Jeff Foxworthy *.wavs.
  • The monitor is up on blocks.
  • Seven blue tick hounds under the desk.
  • Deer jerky in the desk drawer.
  • The screen saver consists of pictures of Ned Beatty with Dueling Banjos playing in the background.
  • The six front keys have rotted out.
  • John Deere Pocket Protectors.


COMPUTER HUMOR

A computer flashed a message to its user:

"I give up! I can't handle it anymore! Let the chips fall where they may!"

 

MONKIE LOGIC

Q: What do you get when you cross a gorilla and a computer?

A: A Harry Reasoner!

 

MONKIE DON'T SEE, MONKIE DON'T DO

A confused caller was having troubles printing documents. He told the technician that the computer had said that it ''could not find the printer.'' The user had even tried turning the computer screen to face the printer-but his computer still could not 'see' the printer.


        

 

 

Have a good line or two that would put a smile on an Ape Face? Check out MacMonkies' Submission Policy and drop us a line!

 

Monkie Business!

Odds and Ends

NEWS OF THE YEAR

Did you know that there are only 364 shopping days till Christmas? Umm...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 the Bottom Lineline4

(What more did you expect?! )


"In Brief"

Info & Updates

Crazy Coconuts Holiday Giveaway

CLICK HERE

for Details!


Bear With Me

Bear with hungry appetite eats hunter in Russia.


MacWorld Expo

MacWorld Expo set in San Francisco January 7-11, 2002


Mac OS9
Virex

January virus definitions


N2MP3 Pro 2.1b7

MP3 encoder


iDisk Manager 1.0.2

Helps manage multiple iDisk accounts


Apple PowerBook
G4 Firmware 4.29

For 550/667MHz PowerBook G4


Digital Juke 2.0

MP3 jukebox player


Acrobat Reader 5.0.5

View, navigate, print PDF files


KidsMenu 1.0

Launcher utility similar to AtEase with many more features


LimeWire 2.0

Gnutella peer-to-peer file sharing client


Eyecon 1.0.1

Tool to create and arrange icon patterns and icons


MP3 Rage 4.0

Gnutella/Napster client, MP3 tag editor, player, cataloger


Startup Doubler 2.6.2

can significantly accelerate startup process time


iSwipe 1.0b13

download/search client for Web, FTP, Hotline, OpenNap, Gnutella


HTML Creator 2.8.1

HTML editor with many features


Snak 4.8.1

IRC client


FTP iDrop 1.0.1

Configurable droplet to upload files to FTP sites


MacDopplerPro
1.7.3

Amateur radio app


A-Dock 2.6.7

App switcher/launcher a bit like OS X's dock


Opera 5.0b5 (Beta)

Next generation browser


Son of Weather Grok 4.1.4

Display current weather conditions on the desktop


Mobile High Speed 2.1.0

High speed data for GSM networks


BitFonter 1.0.4

Unique bitmap font editor


Mac OSX
SNAX 1.1.8

Finder replacement for OS X


StevePerfect X 5.3.2

Word processor, e-mail client, media viewer & more


Mozilla 0.9.7

(Fizzilla) version of mozilla.org's next generation browser


Mac OS X 10.1.2

Next generation system OS


Apple Open Firmware Password 1.0.2

Enable open firmware security features


Envelope Window X 2.0b1

Quickly print out envelopes & store addresses


FractionCalc X 1.1.1

Performs standard math operations on fractions


LimeWire X 2.0

Gnutella peer-to-peer file sharing client


Classic? 0.2.1

Visually indicates Classic's state in the Dock


Ogg Drop 1.0a5

Encodes/Plays OGG audio files from AIFF audio/CD


Simpleshade 1.0

Click in the Dock to collapse/uncollapse finder windows


Rastafied 1.0

Screensaver module


Synchronize! Pro X 1.0b1

File sync, backup, file server mirroring over the net


DropCompress 1.2

File compression utility similar to DropTar


Sputnix 0.4B

Music sharing client for AudioGalaxy


AIM 4.5.494

OS X chat client


MiniCalc 0.2

Handy expression calculator


MacDopplerPro
X 1.7.3

Amateur radio app: satellite track, doppler correction


Calc Thingy 0.7.6

Normal expression calculator


Opera X 5.0b3

Tech preview of the new browser's Carbon version


Oni X 1.31

Action game


Cro-Mag Rally 2.0.2

3D racing game from the makers of Bugdom


MonkieBarrel

 Editor's Notes

Banana Blessings!!

The morning after the Biggest Holiday of the year proves to be a quiet one!

Not much is stirring as of yet.

Hope your Holiday was as truly blessed as it is around here.

Again, we send our thanks to all of you who continue to add the smiles around MacMonkies!

Take Care!

BJW

Network News the Apevine Very Ape Bananas Monkie Business

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